Two down......28 to go! I started radiation yesterday. Last week I was scanned and marked and evaluated so my "design" could be completed. Yesterday all I had to do was show up. I was shown where to change and leave my belongings, then I was led to the radiation room. There was this moment the technicians and I just stood there looking at each other. Elton John was playing on their radio. It was so cold in there. Time felt frozen. Eventually the technician said..."Are you ready? You're going to have to lay down." I had such a mix of emotions. I was thrilled to make it this far in this journey but scared of the unknown. I knew I had to do this so I stretched out on the table in my previously made body mold (intended to keep you in the same position every time so the radiation doesn't zap anything it's not supposed to!) The two technicians immediately began adjusting me and the machine lurking over me when I felt it start. I felt overwhelmed. I tried so hard to stop it but I could feel the tears welling up. Oh mercy stop....think of the beach or a glass of wine or anything else...but then I felt them running down my cheeks. The technicians were so sweet and understanding. They asked did I need some time. One even got a tissue and dabbed my face (remember I'm stretched out on this hard table with both arms over my head). But I said let's do this. I promise I'll get myself together and be ok! Well about 5 minutes later we were done! Not embarrassing at all!
Today I walked in with a smile! I changed into that beautiful gown they provide, went to the radiation room, put my key on the counter and got on the table! I was ready!
I had another "first" this weekend. I attended my first Breast Cancer fundraising and awareness event. We went to the Dragon Boat Festival in downtown Jacksonville, FL. Wow! There were three boats that raced with nothing but breast cancer survivors! The strength and passion in this event was moving. I just stood back and watched. To see such a large gathering of breast cancer survivors together and all receive pink carnations was emotional. But as they all moved towards the beautiful St. Johns River, some with teary eyes and some kissing their flower, they began one by one tossing them in the water. It was as if they were all tossing the bad memories away and moving on with their lives. It's hard to explain the way it made me feel. I realized even though I'm not finished with treatments....I'm a survivor too! All the proceeds went to a local organization called In the Pink - A Boutique for Women Living With Cancer.
|22 Women Per Boat x 3 boats = 66 Breast Cancer Survivors!|
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“Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.”
Colossians 3:12 NIV