LIFE......with a new fear 😐

A cancer diagnosis and looking ahead to a year of treatments was so scary. But let me tell you what was almost as scary.....that day, a little more than a year ago, when I took my last herceptin infusion!

The end of a successful cancer treatment journey is such a celebration!  I praised God it was over and I was cured!  But what I wasn't prepared for was the new fear, a very real fear of recurrence. I realized I was on my own now. No more herceptin.  My port was gone.  I was no longer receiving any of those wonderful drugs to kill and/or prevent cancer cells. It was like freewheeling...hydroplaning....losing control.  It was totally up to my body to put the brakes on if a healthy cell tried to mutate into cancer.  That's a scary thought!  And it was evident that this new fear could consume me.

Dr. Chumsri is the absolute best! 

Last year with a diagnosis of osteopenia caused by the chemotherapy I knew resistance training and physical activity was important to build back my bones.  So that's what I did!  Our bodies survive on what we eat and drink.  So consuming nutritional foods and beverages became very important.....most of the time!  Everybody needs a glass of wine and chicken wings occasionally! And that leads me to my emotional health.....and fears.  Happiness, love, fun and quality of life are worth more than we give credit to stay healthy.

Last month as my scans and appointments approached I found myself preparing for the worst.  Even though I felt so good.....that fear was big.  But after all of the testing I got the good news and was jumping up and down cheering!  I decided that going forward I had to let my faith in God and faith in myself be stronger than my fear.

I worry......of course.  Do I let it consume me...absolutely not.  I live my life the fullest and healthiest that I can.  I try to make good decisions and I enjoy myself.  I love.  I pray.  I give thanks.  When I have aches and pains I sometimes have to fight the fear because I know........cancer can have a mind of it's own.  But I refuse to live in fear!  I choose to be brave and live life without fear.  

It's been an awesome year full of love and life!

Autumn Grace

"Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid."

John 14:27 NIV

Farewell to the Red Devil !

Last week we got to take a little mini vacation to Alabama to visit with my Dad. It was heavenly! He cooked delicious homemade meals determined to fatten me back up!  And the next best part...sitting by the water on the pier!  We moved around some when I was young but having a cabin on the river made Fish River more like home....a constant place...spending weekends, vacations and holidays there. I spent countless hours during the days roaming up and down the river with my brothers swimming and fishing and playing a little croaker badminton (just use your imagination!).  And evenings enjoying family dinners of the "catch of the day" and playing Chinese checkers. Then falling asleep to the sounds of the crickets and frogs. So you can imagine after the extreme emotions of the past couple months the feelings I had when I sat down and felt the warm breeze on my face and smelled the familiar river air.  Tears just flowed. Happy tears. Refreshing. It was just what I needed to gather strength for my last encounter with the "Red Devil"!

But I did it....now I am done with the "Red Devil"!  Four cycles completed with minimal side effects and problems. I did develop a fever and cough which they treated with a wicked strong antibiotic. I am so grateful for my amazing doctors and nurses at Mayo Clinic. Next week involves testing to check my response and health (MRI, echo cardiogram, pulmonary testing) then on to the next phase. Twelve weekly cycles of low dose chemo with two targeted therapies. I'm ready for the cure!  I'm learning as with any goal to focus on the end but a day at a time. Enjoying the happy moments along the way and thanking God for them.

Much love and thanks to everyone for all the prayers and love I'm receiving every day.  I feel and appreciate it more than you can ever imagine.

The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters. He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake. Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me. Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever. (Psalms 23:1-6 KJV)

Fun in the sun...

 If you're all about having fun in the sun follow these 5 no-nonsense tips suggested by Mayo Clinic to keep your skin healthy and glowing for years to come:

1. Protect yourself from the sun
2. Don't smoke
3. Treat your skin gently
4. Eat a healthy diet
5. Manage stress

For more information click here Mayo Clinic